Me...a Leader???

two posts in one day...man...we're on a roll...watch out now....

ok, so i had to go to see my recruiter this morning. i'm supposed to be getting these weekly height/weight checks. most of the time i have to get it done in collinsville...but being home for break, i get to go and get it done by people i at least know. i was hoping that the station would be open today because otherwise i had to wait until after thanksgiving. getting weighted and measured after stuffing my face with turkey and stuff wasn't exactly the best idea in my oppinion. anyways, i found out that the people measuring down in collinsville have been WAY off. my recruiter said it looks like they've been trying to 'hook me up' - meaning they've been trying to mess with the numbers to give me a good score. unfortunately, they have actually been changing the wrong measurement and making things look worse. so, i got a nice surprise today, learning that my body fat count is down lower than i originally thought. good stuff :)

as i was leaving...he called me back to his desk, saying that he had something he was supposed to talk to me about. he called it a new 'oppertunity.' well, it is a great oppertunity...but also involves a tough decision. here's the deal...they are now offering officer candidate school (OCS) to college seniors in the dep program. this means that i would go to this school after basic training. i would, if i end up graduating, enter the army as a second lieutenant instead of a specialist. it's a leadership deal. enlisted soldiers follow and officers lead. it would be more responsibility, more money, better benefits, etc... unfortunately, it would mean that i would give up (possibly) choosing my job. unless you are in the top 10% of your ocs class, you don't choose your job...it is chosen for you. so, i'm not sure what to do. having a higher rank and benefits means you are treated better. however, i've never thought of myself as a loud, outgoing leader. i'm not sure if i could lead. to think about it scares me a little bit...yet it's kinda exciting too. if i decide to try for this school, i'll have to get a whole bunch of references, pictures, and go before a board in january. i talked to james and my parents about this whole deal. james said, "i think you need to follow your heart on this one. you need to do what you think will make you happy." it was weird. part of me wanted him to have a straight forward oppinion on the matter so i could blame my decision on someone. the other part of me was shocked and really glad that he was being so open and supportive. it's my decision....and it was kind of good to hear someone saying to think about yourself a bit. anyways, i talked to my parents too. i got a great compliment from my dad. they are usually few and far between and something i needed to hear whether i believe it or not. he said "i think it is a great oppertunity and i have always seen you as a leader and not a follower. i think by getting a degree you deserve the oppertunity to be offered to you." it made me smile. my dad thinks i have a shot...and that's HUGE :)

well...i'm not going to make a quick decision about this. i think i'm going to tell my recruiter that i am leaning towards a 'yes' and would like all of the info and requirements. i can always say no...but then i'll have the full picture. i think when i get back from break i'm going to take some alone time and maybe a little time fasting over this decision. it's kind of complicated and i need this to not be only my decision. so, in the end, i guess i'm a combination of excited and stressed...but for now it's ok. what a ride....

PFC Coppernoll
:) hehe...that's the first time i've signed anything like that....kinda feels good...